1. So I have to become a porn star to get my birth control covered?

    In 1873 the Comstock Act was passed which prevented any method of birth control from being mailed. During this time many states passed laws which made any form of contraceptives illegal. Anthony Comstock, a leader in the purity movement, felt that contraceptives promoted prostitution and veneral diseise and that preventing conception was immoral. These were the times when women didn’t have a voice or many rights. And we have come so far since 1873…or so I thought.

    It took more than forty years but in 1916 the first birth control clinic was opened in the United States by Margaret Sanger. It was immediately shut down by the police and Margaret Sanger was arrested and sentenced to thirty days in jail. This was four years before women were even granted the right to vote. In 1923 Sanger opened a second clinic, but this one was not shut down. By 1942 there were over 400 birth control clinics in the United States alone. There have been so many victories for women’s rights since the Comstock Act was passed in 1873, which makes me wonder why we are still fighting over these same issues that have plagued our country for almost 150 years. And why is it that in 2012 men are still the voice behind issues that affect women’s bodies?

    Presidential hopeful, Rick Santorum, has stated publicly that he favors making birth control illegal. Thats right. Illegal. One hundred and fifty years after the Comstock Law was passed we are in danger of being put in jail for using contraceptives. Even though the Supreme Court made it illegal for states to ban the use of contraceptives after the Supreme Court case Griswold v Connecticut in 1965.

    Another issue we are facing is the fact that birth control is in danger of no longer being covered under insurance. Why is this? Because it goes against a bunch of middle aged men’s “religious standing.” What ever happened to that whole separation of church and state thing? Another issue that really irks me is that there are politicians who are openly stating that birth control shouldn’t be covered by insurance but they think its perfectly acceptable to cover Viagra. Apparently taking contraceptives is a “lifestyle choice” but not being able to get it up is a “medical condition” and therefor viagra should be covered. What kind of convoluted logic is this? What’s the point of getting an erection if you have no one to have sex with? Because even married people don’t want to have a baby every single time they have intercourse.

    Now if you think that insurance companies covering viagra but not birth control is appalling, just wait. Because it gets even more ludicrous. Apparently according to Rush Limbaugh using birth control makes you a slut and a prostitute. That’s exactly what he called Sandra Fluke, a law student who publicly stated that birth control should be covered under insurance plans. He then said “So Miss Fluke and the rest of you feminazis, here’s the deal, if we are going to pay for your contraceptives and thus pay for you to have sex, we want something. We want you to post the videos online so we all can watch.” What the f*#k? So now we have to become porn stars to get our birth control covered? And why don’t men have to make their sexual escapades available for all the world to see to cover their viagra? Wouldn’t we be essentially paying for them to have sex as well according to Mr. Limbaugh’s logic? I just don’t understand why some of these conservatives are so against people enjoying sex. Guess what? People like sex. Let them enjoy it. Now I agree with the first amendment, but at some point Rush Limbaugh needs to just shut up.

    Another issue many of those with an anti birth control stance are forgetting is that contraceptives have many uses other than preventing pregnancy. It’s used to menstrual cramps, ovarian cysts, PMDD, acne, complications of uterine fibroids and endometriosis, and it can reduce the risks of some types of cancer. What is so wrong with that?

    It has been almost one hundred years since our country’s first birth control clinic opened and women have made such strides since that time. Newsflash. We don’t sit at home and spend all of our time popping out babies anymore. Why can’t we come together as a country and move forward rather than going backwards? Not every woman wants to be a mother, so she should become celibate? As the late Margaret Sanger said, “No woman can call herself free who does not control her own body.” 

  2. Is dressing sexy an invitation to be harassed? I didn’t think so either.

    A few nights ago I was out with a group of girls at a nightclub in Hollywood. We were drinking, dancing, and having a blast as so many twenty something girls do. I don’t usually frequent nightclubs. Personally, I like bars, but occasionally I will venture out to spend a night amongst the pseudo celebrities and beautiful people. The night was going well until we encountered a group of men who clearly did not understand the concept of appropriate behavior. Nor did they understand a woman’s right to personal space and boundaries. I have heard so many stories on blogs and on the news about men being inappropriate with women and justifying it on the woman’s demeanor or their outfit. Regardless of what many high priced fashion designers tell us, the outfit does not make the person. And even if a woman is walking around in a Playboy bunny outfit with bunny ears, that does not give any man the right to touch her. Everyone deserves respect. Period. That night, I learned not everyone believes in that policy.

    Shortly after we arrived at the nightclub a guy in his twenties approached us. He invited us to come to his table and have a drink. (For those of you don’t live in big cities and aren’t familiar with table service it’s when a group of people, usually guys, spend hundreds and maybe even thousands of dollars to sit at a table in a nightclub. Attractive and usually scantily clad waitresses bring them bottles of expensive liquor and mixers.) My friends and I were dancing at the table and the young men had graciously offered us drinks. We were having a good time and then quite quickly the mood changed. I was talking to one of my friends when one of the young men at the table tried to put his arm around my waist. I politely asked him not to touch me. He rolled his eyes and walked away. About twenty minutes later the same young man tried to touch me again, I asked him a second time to please keep his hands off of me. A little while later my friends and I were dancing with each other and talking to some of the more pleasant young men at the table, when the same guy came over. My friends were joking about my dress, which was a bit low cut. The young man proceeded to put his hands into the front of my dress and tried to touch my breasts while laughing. Apparently he thought that since my friends were joking with me and because my dress was low cut that I was inviting people to touch me. Well guess what? That’s sexual assault. I very quickly grabbed his hands and shoved him away from me. He told me I was a bitch. 

    I turned around in hopes of getting support from my friends. Thats when I saw one of them storm off. I followed her and she informed me that she had been pushed very hard by another one of the guys and was looking for security. Apparently one of the guys had tried to grab her behind and she pushed his hand away. He then shoved her extremely hard and told her that we were at his table, drinking his alcohol, and he could do what he wanted. He also told her to “look what we were wearing.” In my opinion we were all dressed sexy but classy. A couple of the girls were in jeans and tops and some in dresses. Yes, they were short. Yes, they may have been low cut. But nothing we had on was any more provocative than any other twenty something girl in any nightclub in the city. And even if we were in lingerie that does not give any man the right to touch us or disrespect us. Shortly after the incident occurred the men were kicked out of the club by security. 

    I began to wonder just how men perceive us. I know that the idea of beauty and sexiness varies from person to person. But do people really think that just because a woman is showing a little skin that she is automatically easy? Or that it is acceptable to disrespect her? We live in a world where pop stars dressed like strippers are glorified and young girls role models look like playmates. No, I am not trying to say that we should dress more conservatively, but sex is everywhere. If you look at any billboard advertising a denim line it will almost always feature a topless girl with her back to the camera. Walk into any mall in America. Every Victoria’s Secret store is plastered with images of women in lingerie. They are not sluts. So why do some people think that it’s okay to grab a woman on the street because she is dressed sexy? Our society has proven many times that just because a woman has sex appeal doesn’t mean she deserves to be grabbed or touched inappropriately. A woman in a sexy dress deserves the same respect as a woman in a conservative business suit.

    Recently I read a quote from a representative of the Toronto Police Service. It read, “Women should avoid dressing like sluts in order to not be victimized.” So basically they are saying that if you are wearing a sexy outfit you deserve to be raped or assaulted. This is not the case. And also how exactly do sluts dress? Because I have seen prostitutes being interviewed on TV wearing expensive designer clothes. And I have seen some well respected Hollywood actresses wearing close to nothing at nightclubs. I know some girls who sleep around quite frequently and are very conservative in their dress and vice versa. Every woman deserves respect regardless of how she is dressed.

    I think that if we stopped making assumptions based on dress this problem would disappear quickly. Just because a woman is showing a little cleavage doesn’t mean it’s acceptable to grab her breasts. Just because another woman is wearing a short skirt doesn’t mean you can grab her behind. No woman deserves to be disrespected, regardless of her outfit. The sooner we get past these stigmas that woman who dress provocatively are sluts the sooner we can move forward. Showing skin is not a crime. Nor is it an invitation for harassment and assault. Men need to take responsibility for their own actions in these cases and stop putting the blame on the women. They aren’t assaulting women because they are dressed “slutty.” They are doing it because they are impertinent, moronic, misogynists. No, I don’t think all men are like this but the ones who inappropriately touch women deserve this title. So guys, next time you see a woman in a sexy outfit. Tell her you think she’s beautiful and sexy. Don’t grab her. Believe me, that works much better anyways.

About me

As a twenty something girl living in Hollywood I have seen and heard many things. I am influenced and inspired by the city around me, my peers, strangers, friends, and everything in between. I don't pretend to have all the answers. I am just offering my opinions. I am not on a crusade to change everyone who disagrees with me. I am just offering a new perspective. But maybe you will think about things differently after hearing what I have to say.

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